It’s insulting! Gold-green rolling hills, white sheep, a pink-and-periwinkle-layered sky. Beauty so piercing and yet, this depression
Category: Poetry – free form
Daffodils
It can’t all be bad, daffodils are blooming I pull the scent of spring deep into my chest and ease the pain for the length of one breath
Green
That shade of green slices hope through my chest, severs conceptions I thought were facts and leaves me wanting
Pearl-Colored Sky
that pearl-colored sky
filled me with optimism.
The bright silver bulb of the sun
shone behind opalescent clouds,
calm stillness hinting that anything at all is possible.
Essence of Life
Sometimes I forget what’s important in life
kept busy thinking about next week, last week,
last year, or the week after next, kept occupied
recalling a moment gone or planning a moment still to come. Sometimes I forget the essence of life exists only in this moment. My breath brings me back to a single heartbeat, the space between thoughts where my essence rests at peace with itself.
Magnetisense
I can’t help it! I am inevitably drawn
inward by a magnetic force
so vast, so compelling
even the brightest sun pales
by comparison.
Obstacle
Imagine my surprise!
Upon learning—
I am my own greatest obstacle.
Juniper, Alder & Elm
Mine enemies have arrived, cloaked in the guise of friends. Reigning Gods
of the natural world, with swaying words and the promise of all things good and youthful.
They steal me from myself. In bitter solitude, I await their slow decline. Long months,
till their inevitable sleep gives me life again.
Patagonia Dreamin'
If I could, I would move to Patagonia where the mountain air blows clean down the hills and the sun sets in angles over the steppes. I found this place through fantasy-escape-mode, a very handy mental tool I employ when things get bad in my real world, such as being an allergy-sufferer in the worst pollen season in recollection. It was on a Monday that I hit the search engine and typed ‘pictures of mountains.’ I wanted something lofty and majestic to put as my desk-top background so that, in between my clerical tasks, I could escape to another land. I searched for mountains and that is where the love-affair began.
A picture popped up: low steppes with a herd of horses grazing and snow-tipped peaks rising into the sky. I can’t explain what happened to me when I saw this place. My mind stilled, settled into itself. I imagined cool, dry air flowing into my lungs. I imagined lying on the stony ground, the wind rustling the grass around me, the sky stormy-blue overhead. This picture called to me. If this were Star Trek, I would have said, “Beam me over, Scotty.” Even the soles of my feet wanted to walk barefoot over those stones.
Still, it was just a picture. I had no real idea where this was. However, I did want to know.
I have the kind of imagination that, once activated, is a bit like a baking soda and vinegar project. Once two things combine (place and longing) a chemical reaction occurs that cannot be stopped; it has to run its course. I did a new search to see if I could locate to origin of my fantasy-picture. Did I mention determination and persistence as part of this potion? Once my mind sets to a track, it does not deviate until the mission is accomplished. It was easy to discover the picture was taken in Argentina Patagonia. Patagonia! A word of legend, buried in my psyche like a forgotten bicycle in an old garage. Did I actually know anything about Patagonia, or was it the romance of the name I found alluring?
I searched google maps and found Patagonia as the southern-most region in South America, bridging the mountains between Argentina and Chile. I looked at the map and asked myself a question. Where, along that mountain range, did I think my fantasy-picture was taken? Of course, I had no reference beyond the photograph, so I opted to utilize instinct and see where it got me. It got me to El Chalten, a tiny town located in Los Glaciares National Park, population 200. I pulled up pictures from the region, which is now heralded as one of the fastest growing tourist spots for back-packer, hikers, and mountain-climbers, and recognized a distinctive mountain peak from the photograph: Mt Fitzroy. I had found my dream destination!
El Chalten is a rare town, situated within a national preserve. There are few year-long residence, but they host a rapidly growing number of tourists each year. Being at the more southern sphere of the globe, they have alternate seasons to the ones we have here in Virginia. Their peak summer season is in January and February, when we’re bundling up around wood stoves and under blankets. From the little I have learned, they have a cool, relatively dry, unpredictable climate. Wind is a near-constant companion and the weather can change in a flash. The hike to give you the best view of Fitzroy takes two days and is, by the accounts I read, not too strenuous and worth the effort. Their winters are cold, and windy, but not as harsh as their far northern counter-parts. And the park is stated by all who visit to be spectacular year-round. I say, what’s not to like?
Aside from the notable absence of over-abundant greenery, other things appeal to me about Patagonia. I like extremes of light, like the high-northern slant of sun seen in Scotland. I like unpredictable weather, perhaps because I’m used to unpredictability from a life of living inside my own head. I like rolling steppes, sparse population, and strongest of all, I like the Andes Mountains. I can’t say what draws me to them; they exert some pull over which I have no domain. They call to me by name. In the center of my being, I feel their echo. Is it because I grew up under the looming presence of another mountain range, the Colorado Rockies? It is something imbedded in my Native American genetics that makes me wish to live in close proximity to their majesty?
I can’t answer these questions. I’ve never been very good at explaining myself to myself. The best I can say is I know I want to be there, that, part of me, while sitting in Virginia, smelling the first of the Honeysuckle bloom, longs to be far away, living in Patagonia.
The Beauty of My Tomatoes
Last year, my garden died. This sad demise came from a combination of sparse rainfall resulting in near drought conditions and a busy life that gave me no time for weeding or watering. I didn’t get a single thing from my early spring planting, a situation I was determined not to repeat this year. My favorites plants to grow and the things I just can’t live without are tomatoes and basil. Utilizing reason, I decided to hedge my bets and plant even more of these than I had last year—thinking this way I could manage to keep one or two alive.
We had a banner rain year.
We had uncommonly cool, often overcast conditions.
I’m sure all that organic compost also had an effect.
We grew a tomato hedge. It is 20 feet long, nearly five feet tall and practically throws tomatoes at you when you walk by. We have been eating buckets of tomatoes for six weeks, now, and there is no sign of slow-down in tomato growth on the vines. We’ve had fresh salsa, fresh pasta sauce, tomato and bean salad, we have roasted them, braised them and finally—when I realize we were never going to be able to eat them—I blanched and froze them. The lower foliage of this hedge is made up of my sixteen basil plants. Recently, I picked and processed an entire trash-bag full of basil! In addition to the many bags of frozen tomatoes that will lend themselves to sauces, soups, and pots of chili, we will be eating pesto all winter long!
I never expected such an explosion. It has occasionally been alarming to watch this hedge grow. But picking them and popping them into my mouth fresh off the vine is one of my favorite summer pleasures. In honor of my tomatoes, I wrote the following poem. I hope you enjoy this journey into my garden life and kitchen. I would love to hear about yours.
The Beauty of My Tomatoes
I wish I could describe the beauty
of my tomatoes
adequately
so you could see them
sitting
In the bamboo steaming basket
above
my black granite counter-top
Oblong and bright red or
pale orange with streaks of green or
yellow ones
perfectly round and tiny as a dime
Light from the window
falls over them
brushes their skins
with gold
Were I a photographer
I would not have to
struggle
to explain
That these are not my big tomatoes
those beef-steaks sit
in round legions
like bright buns rising
on a lime-green dish towel
These are my other tomatoes
my cherrys and romas
tumbled together
in the straw-colored basket
I pick one to eat
the still-life altered
by my desire
for sweetness and
the taste the summer on my tongue
They are humble in size
but not in brilliance
they sit boldly in the fading light
urging me to eat
I wish I could bring
you
here
Into this moment
Where a tomato bursts
ripe and fresh
between my teeth
So you could see
with your two eyes
and taste
with your own lips
the beauty of my tomatoes
